-
![]()
Marriage- finding the right hard work
With low connection, we are less patient. People talk about being roommates but the research says low intimacy couples act like siblings- family but lots of bickering. We don’t let go of things, we don’t cut our partner much slack and we assume negative intention quickly.
-
![]()
Fighting for Connection- Minnesota Style
Minnesota nice is the stereotypical behavior of people born and raised in Minnesota to be courteous, reserved, and mild-mannered. I love Minnesota- born and raised here and this week I can’t even hate the weather. I not only specialize in relationship counseling, but after 15 years I now specialize in Minnesotan relationship counseling. If a couple comes into my office yelling at each other and outwardly angry I usually open…
-
![]()
Just a bunch of divorce musings…. When is it time to leave?
(If you see yourself in this week’s newsletter, you’re right…all of you who can’t decide, who want me to tell you what to do, who are waiting for a sign, who are so unhappy that it can’t be good for anyone. This time I really am talking to you…oh but not all of you…) I went to this fantastic training sponsored by Erickson Mediation last week. http://ericksonmediation.com/resources/emi-newsletter/ I trained with…
-
![]()
Wiping my tears- Time for Service and Resistance
Wednesday was awful and I feared I couldn’t write, couldn’t see clients. Everyone I voted for lost. Today I woke up ready to fight. My progressive politics are an integral part of my Marriage Geek message- you are not required to read any further. I get it that lots of people don’t agree with me but the greatest thing about the internet is that everyone can have their own soap…
-
![]()
Our Violent Reaction to Being Hurt
The number one thing that couples fight about is not what you might think. We always fight about getting our feelings hurt. We argue about the dishes and money and time but it isn’t a fight until someone’s feeling get hurt- and someone’s feelings always get hurt. And the gloves come off. Attachment relationships mean we NEED the connection and support of a few key people and having that sense…
