2017 Bites the Dust

“If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got.” Henry Ford

New Years is an arbitrary holiday when we celebrate the turn of the odometer of our lives and the purchase of a new calendar. We look back at the 12 months passed, what we’ve accomplished, what we’ve lost and we look ahead at the enormous possibility of the uncharted waters of the year ahead.

January is a hot month for marriage counselors… and divorce attorneys. Getting through the holidays is tough but now what? Throw in the towel or renew the relationship?

Want some help with doing things differently in 2018? Check out next week’s workshop- Taking it to the Next Level in the New Year.  (Or maybe Stop Yelling! on the 23rd.)

Take an evening and create a plan for you as a couple and as a family. Whether it is money or exercise or parenting, create a plan that deepens your support of each other. The two of you together are stronger when you work together. Goal setting is powerful and it can be fun. Let’s celebrate together. We’ll work through some goal setting tools but compared to my other workshops, this one gives you a lot more time to talk. The American Legion has a nice bar menu -grab dinner or apps and a drink and make a date night of it.

TOP NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS

  • Lose weight
  • Enjoy life to the fullest
  • Spend less, save more
  • Spend more time with friends/family
  • Get organized

Positive psychology and yoga call us to set an intention rather than a resolution. An intention is a decision to focus on a virtue to cultivate.

Be patient. Be grateful. Be present. Breath deeply. Love fully. Let go. Forgive with abandon. Receive with grace.

If we transfer the top resolutions to intentions we can choose mindful eating, mindful spending, being active, being connected.  Mostly we need to slow down and have our behavior reflect our values.

Say yes to the relationships in your life. Say yes to being active. Say yes to new experiences and risks. Slow down and be mindful of your consumption- eat and spend with care.

Last year I wrote about my intentions for 2017 and updated them for the year ahead.

Here is my 2018 Battle Plan

Pick my battles- I won’t let myself be overwhelmed. What am I going to do about global warming, Syria, homelessness, racism, homophobia, Obama Care, greed…. This year  I pick the battle of the sexes. In my work, in my family, in my writing 2018 is the year of hearing women, calling out male privilege and creating relationships that serve all of us.

Set firm limits-I am 54 years old and I know stuff…. I promise to speak up against bigotry and hatred and not allow others’ hateful behavior or words go unnoted.

Stay present– I won’t check out.  Media (social and otherwise) has become a mind numbing drug. I promise to have coffee or cocktails or break bread with people in real life and ask them how they are doing…and listen.

Model respect and integrity. I will remember that someone is always watching. My actions, my choices are my values. I will trust that nothing is more powerful than setting a good example.

Have faith  We all in this together. The greatest gift I can give to anyone is to see the best in them and never give up. There are rocky stages but they are stages. I promise to keep my eyes open for the best in others.

Love fiercely  I guess it all boils down to love fiercely. It’s what we are built for, it is the challenge before us. Care deeply. Jump in. Be vulnerable. Get dirty. Listen intently. In all things, against all odds, I will bring my heart.

We are activists- in our families, in our relationships, in our communities. I wish you and yours an amazing 2018 that stretches you to be more than you thought you could be.

Happy New Calendar- Maureen