Slow the BLEEP Down

I do not think that the world is going to hell in a handbasket…whatever that even means. I do not believe that things were safer, saner, healthier, simpler in some black and white television 50s version of the good old days. I like technology and science and progress.  I am excited to consider what else will change in my lifetime.

That said, 100 years ago we had 24 hour days. Nothing has changed. We have the same amount of time as our ancestors had and as much time as our grandchildren will have. It is “fair”. It can’t be borrowed or stolen or lost. We have one amazing asset that we must learn to manage better. We have to pace ourselves.

We are a generation of busy people. We don’t have enough time. We are overwhelmed. We can’t get ahead. We are behind schedule. We are over extended. How did this happen? How are we all so time poor?

Remember space food? We were supposed to just pop pills instead of all this complicated prep work. In the 70s there was a lot of talk about innovation and automation leading to a 4 day work week. Computers were going to do away with paperwork and make our lives simpler. Obviously there are large system issues at work here that aren’t really Marriage Geek territory so I will stick to what I know.

What is your relationship with time? Do you live within our means? How realistic are you about how long things take, how much time you have? Do you have some kind of time budget and if you do are you spending your time in line what you value? Are you clear about how much sleep, exercise, work and play are necessary to live well?

We are up against every parenting book telling us how responsible we are for our children’s scary future. We are up against Pinterest costumes and crafts and meals and cake decorations. We are supposed to create timeless memories then take pictures in coordinated outfits, put them into artful scrapbooks, send copies to the grandparents and make sure the mess is all cleaned up before we get to lay our heads down for the day. We are supposed to brush and floss and exercise and Kegal and meditate and read to our kids and maybe even to ourselves.

If you look back on the past month, what are was it all about? Did it measure up? What parts were really not worth the time you spent? You can have it all, but not all on the same day. One day you get to focus on cleaning but don’t expect to cook. If you want to create a perfect day with the kids, they will be dirty and tired and nothing else will get done. If you take time for yourself, the kids will have to do without you for a bit.
If you can’t stop being busy at least stop saying you’re busy all the time. Just be. Live an hour at a time in a way that trusts that it will all be fine- you get another hour and another day and it works out.